February Newsletter

Welcome to the newsletter from Distance Families

DISTANCE FAMILIES NEWS

When people think of digital nomads, they often picture young, carefree individuals—likely child-free—roaming the world while working remotely. And yes, plenty of these exist. But digital nomadism isn’t just for solo travellers. Many families are embracing this lifestyle, balancing global careers with the demands of parenting.
Take my niece, for example. She and her husband, along with their two teenagers, have lived in places like Singapore, Portland, and Bermuda. She has built a successful coaching career, while he has sustained global contract roles remotely. Recently, they decided to repatriate to New Zealand, bringing their nomadic chapter to a pause—at least for now.

​Yet, even back home, the realities of working across time zones persist. When our extended family gathered to celebrate New Year's Day—a public holiday in New Zealand—her husband was at his desk. For him, it was still New Year's Eve in the U.S., a regular workday that couldn’t be ignored. This is the trade-off many digital nomads accept. The freedom to live anywhere comes with the challenge of blending work and life across different time zones. It’s not always glamorous, but for those who choose this path, the rewards often outweigh the sacrifices.
The New Zealand government has recently made it easier for digital nomads to move to our shores. Here’s a link to the official announcement.

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BOOK SERIES NEWS

The words distance and distant often feature in conversations, research, and writing about intergenerational, geographically separated families. While the two terms are related, their meanings differ subtly, and they are frequently (and unintentionally) mixed up.

• Distance refers solely to geography.
• Distant can refer to geography and/or the quality of a relationship.

As the founder of DistanceFamilies.com and the author of the Distance Families book series I’ve seen this mix-up occur so often that I decided to invest in the domain name DistantFamilies.com. If you type it in you’ll be directed to my website! The confusion is understandable—it’s easy to assume that geographical distance automatically equates to emotional distance.
But here’s one of my strongest messages: it doesn’t have to be that way.
I’ve met countless parents and grandparents who proudly share that they are closest to the family members who live the furthest away. Why? Because all parties—often led by dedicated and intentional Distance Sons and Daughters (and sons-law and daughters-in-law ) who make extraordinary efforts to stay connected. And it works.
So, never feel that geographical separation must lead to emotional distance. With intention, effort, and communication, distance does not have to mean distant.

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ON THE HOME FRONT

Life at home has revolved around our far-flung family coming and going. Last month, my U.K. stepson wrapped up a five-week stay, returning home in mid-January. For a few days, he embraced the digital nomad lifestyle also, lecturing online between 1 a.m. and 6 a.m. I was amazed at how smoothly we all managed this, given that we now live in an apartment. To avoid disturbing us, he’d fill a thermos with tea, stock up on snacks, and keep to his end of the apartment—avoiding nocturnal trips to the kitchen. As we were waking up, he was heading to bed, and we found our daily rhythm, reconnecting around lunchtime.

Now, we’re gearing up for the next wave of visitors. Next weekend, our U.S. daughter arrives with our grandsons, ages 8 and 10. Two weeks later, our U.S. son, daughter-in-law, her mother, and our 1-year-old grandson will join the mix. For three precious nights, we'll be in the same city/country, filling our home to capacity. What a wonderful “problem" to have!

​If there were a book called Confessions of a Grandmother, I’d have a chapter dedicated to my latest indulgence—buying over 100 traditional fruit mince pies for my grandsons, who absolutely love these English treats. They were on special at the supermarket, and come close to qualifying as a healthy snack. My daughter did the math: “That’s just two a day for the boys, plus one for Grandad, me, and you!”
Another great find? A ball shaped like a globe, discovered at a charity shop for $4. A small price to pay for a bit of joy and a reminder of how far and wide our family is spread. New Zealand is missing though, but we're used to that Downunder.  Perhaps that's why I found it in a charity shop!

​Take care until next time
Helen Ellis
 
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