Distance Families
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REVIEWS

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MEDIA PRINT REVIEWS

Sunday Star Times
NZ Booklovers
​Kiwi Reviews NZ 
GrownUps
More Than Grand
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​Book Chat from Takapuna Library, Auckland, NZ
The Westerly
North Harbour News
North Shore Times
Northern Advocate
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READERS' REVIEWS

Hi Helen, I recently retired & finally purchased your 1st book. I just want to say…”Oh my goodness, your writing is so “spot on” (cathartic) to the life of a Distance Grandparent”. Thank you so much for your work! Grandmother on the East Coast of USA and family in Melbourne, Australia
I just finished your audiobook today and feel like I know you and your family even though I've never actually met you. Thank you for sharing your struggles and challenges so openly. It's truly a great inspiration for me.
Anieke Lamers
Distance Aunt and Founder of Peekabond
I am listening to your book: I wish my parents would have had the opportunity to read it/listen to it years ago.
Ute Limacher-Riebold PhD, Ute' s International Lounge
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Loved hearing the author on radio - please pass on my feedback to her. Has purchased the book for her parents in the U.K.
Distance Daughter shopper in N.Z.
I am a distance grandparent and a sociologist. I loved your book [...] I'm also looking forward to your book about the grandchildren, as the teen years are so hard to maintain connections with from a distance, and so much changes for them in those years. All the best. 
Jan Cameron, Sociologist
Helen's book walks distance grandparents through all the little intricacies of their role and gives research for each. Emotional and economic challenges, together with authentic stories are mentioned. The book helped me understand how my parents may feel and how I, expat, may be able to support them. A helpful and special book that will resonate with many.
Barbora Gemmelová
Distance Daughter & Expat Coach, Italy - Turn Italian
​Many of us here have grandchildren at a distance or in another country and I think this will be a very useful addition not our library.
In fact, a patron has already borrowed it this morning, so I had to process it then and there so she could take it!
Thank you so much for your generous spirit in donating your book. It is a asset to our library.
Librarian at an Auckland Retirement Village
Δεν υπάρχει λεπτομέρεια κατάστασης σκέψεων , συναισθημάτων και πρακτικών όπως και θαυμάσιων συμβουλών που να μην ξεδιπλώθηκαν σε αυτό το βιβλίο. Μια προσέγγιση ενσυναίσθησης σε ένα πολύ λεπτό και επίκαιρο θέμα της παγκοσμιοποίησης. Πώς είναι να έχεις οικογένεια μακριά; Πώς είναι να είσαι γιαγιά που προσπαθεί να κρατήσει ζωντανές τις σχέσεις της με τα παιδιά και τα εγγόνια; Ένα πλούσιο υλικό για αυτήν την πραγματικότητα που τη ζουν πολλοί άνθρωποι αλλά η Helen Ellis τόλμησε πραγματικά με το βιβλίο της να μεταφέρει στους αναγνώστες τόσο απλά μα και τόσο περιεκτικά και γλυκά. Ένα δυναμικό βιβλίο -οδηγός που αγγίζει μεγάλο αριθμό ανθρώπων στις μέρες μας και τους κάνει να μοιράζονται πολλές από τις σκέψεις και προβληματισμούς που περιγράφονται. Είναι παραγματικά όμορφο να συναισθάνεσαι με άλλους ανθρώπους ίδια θέματα αλλά πιο ουσιαστικό να τα εκφράζεις κάνοντάς τα βιβλίο.
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​"There is no detail of the state of thoughts, feelings and practices as well as wonderful tips that have not unfolded in this book. An empathic approach to a very delicate and topical issue of globalization. What is it like to have a family away? What is it like to be a grandmother trying to keep her relationships with children and grandchildren alive? A rich material for this reality that many people live but Helen Ellis really dared with her book to convey to the readers so simple but so comprehensive and sweet. A dynamic guidebook that touches a large number of people today and makes them share many of the thoughts and concerns described. It is really beautiful to feel the same issues with other people but it is more essential to express them by making the book."
Kaliopi (Popy) Raekou, Athens  
Teacher and author of The colorful balloons
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I loved this book and Helen’s powerful message of acceptance for a grandparenting journey that might not be what you envisioned, but is very possible, from a distance. By drawing on academic research, interviews with grandparents and her personal experience, Helen provides an in-depth and thoughtful look at what it feels like to be grandparenting from a distance. You will recognise yourself, your emotions and your story in this book - and when you are finished it, you are sure to feel less alone. 
Dr Kerry Byrne, PhD, Founder of The Long Distance Grandparent
I devoured your book. May I collect a bunch for some friends?
Distance mother in New Zealand
While globalization has brought many new opportunities for families to explore the world, it has also brought new challenges. What happens when these global journeys result in generations who used to live near one another are now separated by Oceans? How do family relationships survive and thrive in this 'new normal'? This book tackles these hard questions and offers clear strategies for families can successfully navigate these previously uncharted waters.” 
Ruth E. VanReken, Hon DLitt,
Co-author, Third Culture Kids, 3rd ed
Co-founder, Families in Global Transition
This book is a comprehensive and expansive look at what it is to live far away from your grandkids all the while maintaining that singular closeness we all yearn for. Ellis, a seasoned distance grandmother herself, provides great tips, perspective, and a lot of empathy for anyone who is a global or distance grandparent.
Emily Morgan, host of The Grand Life podcast
Even as a third-generation Distance Grandparent, through both circumstance and choice, I learnt from this book. Helen Ellis has encapsulated the issues - the complexities, the unpredictables but also the joys by helping the reader understand that ultimately Being a Distance Grandparent is a balancing act.
Apple Gidley​, author of Expat Life Slice by Slice
This splendid book is a must read for anyone living and working abroad, as well as those considering a long distance move or transfer to a foreign country! Helen's writing is comprehensive and lucidly organized.  She has elegantly combined research, anecdotal evidence, and personal experience, as a distance mother and grandmother to create a significant resource for expatriates, repatriates and third culture kids (TCK's).
Teri Sand, Transitions Therapy International, MEd (University of Cambridge), MA Couns/Psych, BA, DipCouns, PGCert, WCPC, MBACP, ICP, (Snr Accred)  
I wish I had read this book before our first translocation. This book is a well-structured, informative and knowledge based read about distance grandparenting. Throughout the book Helen offers a broad range of perspectives as a New Zealander distance grandparent which gives a very authentic yet disciplinary approach to the understanding of the topic. With her honesty and personal voice the book becomes a very enjoyable easy reading. It is a must-read for each member of a distance family, a book you should read over and over again."
Judit Vegh, Intercultural Psychology Expert
I have now finished reading the well researched, informative book on Distance Families written by my author friend, Helen Ellis.
Her ability to study in-depth, write honestly and portray the many aspects of distance parenting and grandparenting throughout the book is admirable.
Many chapters held my attention, but especially the topics regarding acceptance and reflection of the past. Also, the comment on how knowing your love language is of great assistance in relating with how our families and selves respond to the situations we find ourselves in presently.
Having children and grandchildren who live at a distance from me, I relate to the situations we work through in distance relationships in the 21st century.
But, it is not something new. My fiction series of books focus on the realities of my own historical families. They left their families and countries of birth to live permanently in Australia and New Zealand from the mid-1800s until the 1920s.
The challenges of making their decisions and the reasons for leaving loved ones behind have been pivotal in my research.
These ‘why?’ questions have existed throughout my life. Answering them has brought many beneficial psychological benefits.
Therefore, reading Helen’s chapters, including the one broaching the historical element of distance families and how the families at home coped with never seeing their children or grandchildren again, brought another aspect to light.
In Helen’s book, the concluding chapter regarding the effects of covid on distance family is timely. Like Helen’s family, our family living in Australia and our son who lived pre covid in Indonesia have been affected.
It’s been two years since I’ve seen my Australian family, and I’m forever thankful for regular video messaging. I’ve watched young teen boys grow to six-foot-tall young men over that time. Their parents are enjoying working from home and the less hectic lifestyle. We are all in places of acceptance now, adapting to what is, considering Trev and I were the ones who left Australia and returned home to New Zealand.
My son, who resided in Indonesia, who had a hurried and challenging return to Australia early in 2020, has made the best of returning to his Australian home and business, which he ran from afar. But, he is eager to make his return to the remote surfing tourist island he usually lives on, off the coast of Jakarta.
He has hope for the future to return to new normality once covid vaccinations have made a difference worldwide. He travelled to New Zealand to visit us recently when the travel bubble opened.
And how we hugged! To hold those you love in your arms is one of the finest experiences of family love possible.
I recommend this well researched book to everyone who relates to distance family relationships such as I have commented above.
Glennis Annie Browne, Author


In our mobile world, more young people are growing up in communities and countries away from their grandparents and extended family. In this fascinating book, a distance grandparent discusses the hot topics related to addressing grief, building emotional resilience, supporting distance children and grandchildren, handling rituals, navigating the uncertainty of ageing and more. As a physician and parent who has raised children around the globe, this book provides thoughtful advice for those who are navigating cultures, moves and generations.
Dr Anisha Abraham, Pediatrician and author of Raising Global Teens: Parenting in the 21st Century
This is a book I wish I could have put in my parents' hands and read myself when I found out I was pregnant. We could have referenced these things over the last decade, but I didn't get to have that and neither did my family. But at least other families can now. I am looking forward to sharing this book, and future books, with distance sons, daughters, grandchildren and distance grandparents so they can focus on keeping connections across the distance.
Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC, Intercultural Strategist, Podcaster
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The demography of high income societies in the 21st century is fascinating in its implications. This book deals with an aspect that has received little attention, distance grandparenting. It provides an engaging account of the issues and helps answers the questions about “why” as well as the “how to”. I thoroughly recommend this book, both for those who are already “distance grandparents” and for those who are interested.
Distinguished Professor Paul Spoonley, Massey University
Distance grandparents and their families will find much to learn from in this useful and personable book. Helen Ellis clearly knows the territory, and lays out a road map that points out emotional challenges, common family dynamics and practical advice, from what to have in the guest room during family visits to how to manage time zone differences.
Anne P. Copeland, Ph.D.
Founder and Director, The Interchange Institute

I have been a distance grandparent for the last 20 years to my son's four children, who live in Scotland. This book illustrates many useful hints and tips to keep the pathways of communication open.  It is both amusing and thought-provoking, and I wish I had had the opportunity to read it years ago. Helen provides an in-depth approach using academic research as her base.
Sally Sims, New Zealand

It is amazing that Helen's book is out when we need it the most.  Having raised our own children as expats the information is irreplaceable. Many of us are dealing with multi-generational distance familying without any resource books out there. 
Julia Simens, author of Emotional Resilience and the Expat Child
Every distance family member (and the professionals supporting them) should read this book! Being a Distance Grandparent fosters mutual understanding and empathy between generations through rich testimonials and precious practical tips. It is the best gift you could offer somebody separated from their family: allowing them to find a sense of belonging, and tools to create meaningful change in their relationships.
Isabelle Rampa, Clinical Psychologist working with mobile families and distance parent (mother to the 5th generation living abroad)
In the book Distance Grandparents, Helen develops the concept of distance families and offers a comprehensive and readable framework for international migrants. Helen has combined her own personal experience, anecdotal evidence, and research to create this resource!
Reading real stories from Distance Grandparents make me understand how my own parents were dealing with my decision of moving to the other side of the earth!
Helen's research and the way she compiled the information is a new way of approaching intergenerational relationships. I really recommend it. I can't wait for this book to be translated into French so I will offer it to my parents!
​Melisa Cohen, Pure Results Coaching
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This book is so important to help all generations to understand each other. I really enjoyed reading it and will recommend it to all my Solo Parenting Expats."
Rhoda Bangerter, author of Holding The Fort Abroad
This is going to be the book every international family didn’t know they needed.”
Keri Bloomfield, author of Nothing like a Dane
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The book covers myriad issues such as the best strategies for good communication, dealing with guilt, family dynamics, and remaining emotionally resilient. Nurturing relationships may be hard with grandchildren who develop different accents (or even languages) , traditions, expectations and have little or no experience with what the grandparents regard as the ‘home’ country.  It is a book that provokes much reflection on the nuances of long distance relationships within families, and two further books are planned for the children’s and grandchildren’s understanding.
John Williamson, Editor, The Westerly & Distance Grandfather
I loved this book. It is full of practical, valuable information with so many real life stories. A must read for any families who are separated by distance. My grandsons are in the same city but I still gathered great advice and practical tips. The fabulous tips on international travelling at the end was a real bonus.
Highly recommended. Would make a great gift.
Liz Chaney, Auckland, New Zealand
I liked the author and her stories, and I respected her authority on the subject - even though I'm not a grandparent and I don't have grandchildren.​... your book resonated with me. In places I was tearful. It's also given me some very helpful perspective.
Proofreader
You came across as a really caring person in the book and I found myself very inspired to improve my relationship with all generations of my family...​I found it an emotional read having lived in so many different places... Developing a deeper relationship with my grandparents was part of a wider project of mine to regain that English identity, and it was so rewarding to read sections of your book that discuss the importance of inter-generational relationships. I really came away from the book realising that family is absolutely also a verb, something we have to invest in and take time to reap its rewards.
Sub-editor


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  • Home
  • Helen's Story
  • Book Series
    • Being a Distance Grandparent
    • Being a Distance Son or Daughter
    • Being a Distance Grandchild
  • Reviews
    • Being a Distance Grandparent
    • Being a Distance Son or Daughter
    • Write a review
  • Shop
    • Being a Distance Grandparent
    • Being a Distance Son or Daughter
  • Interviews
  • Resources
    • Articles
    • Helpful Reading
  • Follow
  • Monthy Newsletter
  • Libraries
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