February Newsletter

Welcome to the monthly newsletter from Distance Families

DISTANCE FAMILIES NEWS

There are a couple of events coming up that might be of interest.
On Tuesday 14 February I will be speaking at the Estuary Arts Centre in Orewa, North Auckland. If you know any expats, migrants or distance grandparents in the Hibiscus Coast area do let them know. Also, my books are now available at centre’s Weka Gift Shop and closer to home, the Hobsonville Optometrist Glasses & Gifts.

​The following week on Wednesday 22 February I will be facilitating an author chat with a fascinating lady, Joyce Agee who wrote The Newcomers Dictionary. Anyone, from anywhere can plug into this online event – no charge and you don’t need to be a member of FIGT. All you need to do is register in advance so the Zoom link can be sent to you. It is recorded and those who register later receive a recording link if the time zone doesn’t work for you.
For full details of both events please click here.

Looking for some interesting reading? Here are a couple of articles I have shared online that have been well received.
There are plenty of more here.

Language Matters: Figurative expressions abound in anyone’s language
Even if distance families share the same language they still need to be ‘on their toes’ as figures of speech vary from country to country.
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The parents are your most important partners when it comes to connecting with your long distance grandchildren
“In an age when parents are constantly barraged with messages on social media that they are not enough, not doing enough with their children and reminded often they could be doing more or being more – you have such a unique opportunity to let your grandchildren’s parents know they are indeed enough – and not only that, but that they are doing an amazing job."
Kerry Bryne, Ph.D.

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BOOK SERIES NEWS

Researching and writing the third book of the Distance Families Book Series, Being a Distance Grandchild – a Book for ALL Generations is on the agenda for 2023. I will publish it is 2024. Right now ‘the book’ is a ring binder of messy notes, many folders of formal research and a bunch of mainstream books I am in the middle of reading and others I need to read again... plus a whole lot of ideas constantly swirling around in my brain.
Before I ever wrote a book, I naively imagined authors just sat down and wrote – and that was that. Sadly it’s not that simple for most of us. For me, writing a book is like putting a massive jigsaw together – one that has lost the cover with the picture. Random thoughts come from here and there and I am constantly thinking, “where did I write about that earlier?” Thank goodness for the Word search engine. My first books were each around 60,000 words. It’s not uncommon to find authors write 75,000-80,000 words before they finally tell themselves in a very loud voice, “stop”. That is me. 

Just a reminder that you may listen to and read the following free chapters.
Being a Distance Grandparent: listen to the Introduction narrated by me
Being a Distance Son or Daughter: read the chapter, Unpacking Emotions

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ON THE HOME FRONT

​A week ago, Auckland where I live, experienced a month's rain in just a few hours. The downpour had been forecasted but the volume took everyone by surprise. Elton John was performing and the concert was cancelled just 30 minutes prior to commencement - that's how much of a surprise it was. The heaviest rain... ever.  People died.
 
Auckland isn't a tidy symmetrical city with a ring road. It sits on extinct volcanoes with lots of hills and cliffs with a huge harbour on the easterly side heading out to the Pacific Ocean and another harbour on the westerly side to the Tasman Ocean. It's a messy city to manage in a disaster.
 
I can report we were safe. The photo on the right shows how high the water reached in our garden and created a swimming pool in our back yard. The photo on the left is typical of many parts of the city. I know two elderly ladies (80s & 90s) who live just 15 minutes away and experienced torrents of water in their retirement village villas. Life is going to be tough for them. Fortunately, they have near, ‘in-country’ family but everyone’s' lives have been thrown into disarray for months.

This is a stark wake up call for all distance family generations. Whether it is an unexpected illness, an accident, an ailing loved one or these days, a global warming weather disaster at home or abroad – geographical separation doesn’t always blend well. Questions are rightly get asked about whether one or other is living in the right place. Values are reassessed and for some, big tipping-point decisions regarding repatriation are on the table… and that’s okay. ​

​On a lighter side the day after our family flew out we had a wonderful, retractable pergola installed in our garden. A welcome relief from the sun (when it decides to show itself). Of course it was supposed to be installed before our family arrived for Christmas, but thanks to endless shipping delays it never happened. We’ll all get to enjoy it another time.
Finally, on our recent summer holiday I was encouraged (pushed!) to enter the Supergran Award at the holiday camp. I am delighted to advise I won. One for the CV.

​Take care until next time
Helen Ellis
 
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