February Newsletter

​Welcome to the newsletter from Distance Families

DISTANCE FAMILIES NEWS

Have you ever considered how much you THINK about your distance family? How much and how often we think about each other is a consideration in the dynamics of any distance family. Have a read about The Distance Family Thinking Pie.


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​​Another dynamic worthy of reflection is when the geographical movement of family is in reverse of the traditional trends. Here are my snowy thoughts on the topic of grandparents who initiate the move.

When English isn’t your mother tongue and you live in a culture diverse from your own it’s important to work on meeting and making friends with locals, however, there’s still a need to find a community of your own people. Latin Stories Australia is a success story supporting Latino migrants in Australia. Like to learn more? Please join me on a Families in Global Transition, Australia and NZ Affiliate webinar with Latin Stories Australia Founder and Director, Trini Abascal. Click here for more information.

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BOOK SERIES NEWS

​Work on the final book in the Distance Families Book Series, Being a Distance Grandchild took a wee rest while I was travelling for two months. However, that didn’t mean its stories didn’t travel with me.

I was on a coach between Prague, Czech Republic and Budapest, Hungary and the Hungarian guide shared history about his country. He explained that the Hungarian language has Asiatic links and is unique. It has no links or similarities to its neighbouring Slavic languages. Only Hungarians speak Hungarian. Consequently, the language has limited practical use outside of its national home. Then the guide said something that immediately struck me… “we have to move abroad to learn languages”. That is the title I have already given in my book draft to a special Hungarian Distance Granddaughter’s story. Here it is...
Excerpt from the draft of Being a Distance Grandchild

​Her maternal [Hungarian] grandmother was free-spirited and not the least concerned about what people thought. She rescued plants and animals. Her chaotic, cluttered home and garden felt like a circus to young Anna but she had a “magic touch” with anything that grew or moved. Fitting in and doing ‘normal’ things wasn’t for her. Others would sometimes disapprove. Cooking wasn’t important to her but she was famous for a couple of sweet dishes. “I still remember the taste of her filled doughnuts and apple pie. No one knew how she made them like her. It was her magic again. Even my other traditional grandmother couldn’t understand how her doughnut secret”. She had never travelled and spoke only Hungarian. Life was tough for her but she never complained.
Her broken-record mantra to her young granddaughter Anna was, “learn other languages and go abroad”. Initially, this message never stuck with Anna and she even forgot about it for a time. In time Hungarian children had to learn Russian. No other languages were allowed in schools. When this regime changed and Anna began to learn English the Hungarian school system was behind as there were so few English teachers. Those who taught were scrambling to cope, constantly one lesson ahead of their students.
At the age of 21 years, Anna decided it was time to travel and learn other languages. She took herself off to the U.K. settling in Surrey, working as an au pair and studying English. She understood little of the local language but persevered. As soon as Anna moved abroad she remembered her grandmother’s mantra and realised a seed had been planted at the back of her mind. She sensed that English was the most important language to tackle.

There was a special connection for me when the guide spoke as it did. Being a Distance Grandchild will be published in 2024 (ish). For more info please click here.

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ON THE HOME FRONT

​‘Home’ since late November to mid-January has not been New Zealand. Hubby and I have experienced one of the most MEGA trips of a lifetime – close on 8 weeks away in the Northern Hemisphere winter. 

We visited with family in five locations: Edinburgh, Exeter, Wiltshire, London and Chicago. Separately we enjoyed a river cruise from Budapest to Amsterdam, experienced many Christmas markets, explored in snow, ice and temperatures as low as -24C – all amazing experiences. Unique times were spent with our older U.K. grandchildren (21 – 24 years). During all this our 7th grandchild was born in Chicago and we had a few days of grandparent cuddles enroute to home. 

We had to occasionally dig-deep as we navigated 60+ flight hours, moved from place-to-place, household to household all the while sleeping in 10 different beds and travelling through 11 countries. When you visit family overseas, I can vouch for the fact that some trips are good, and some trips are extra special. This one was, without a doubt, in the extra special category. We are most grateful we managed to make it happen.
I also admit it was glorious to walk in the door of home and immediately put on a sundress!

​Take care until next time
Helen Ellis

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